Creepy Christmas Seafood Mousse 

This one will be sure to get your guest all excited for the holidays. Nothing says Christmas is here like a Creepy Christmas Mousse!

- 2 cups cooked shrimp, minced 

- 3/4 cup minced onion 

- 3/4 cup minced celery 

- 1 (10.75 ounce) can condensed cream of celery soup 

- 1 (8 ounce) package cream cheese, softened 

- 1 envelope (1 tablespoon) unflavored gelatin 

- 1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice 

- 1 cup mayonnaise 

In a medium saucepan, heat soup and add cream cheese. Heat until cheese is dissolved into the soup. Dissolve gelatin into the soup mixture and add lemon juice, mayonnaise, onion, celery and shrimp. Cook until heated through. 

Grease a 6 cup Ugly Fish mold (or any other creepy mold you just happen to have laying around for that occasion you may want to creep out your dinner guest) with extra mayonnaise (because that is the healthy way to do it) or non-stick spray (especially the kind with extra plastic). Fill mold firmly (because handling such an ugly beast gently would not improve it’s looks) with mixture. Smooth off the top and chill in refrigerator ( in a dark place, covered in with a dark lid to keep from scaring the other food in the refrigerator) overnight. 

Make sure to select a platter that is just as ugly as the mousse and then cover it with greens and especially just the 3 cherry tomatoes, because that will really help convince your guest to eat this dish. 

Invert mold onto platter and shake to release the mousse from mold. Garnish as desired (because that will somehow distract from the creepiness of the dish)

Ben's Bethlehem Barbeque Burger Bean Bake 

This one will leave you full of b's! Enjoy this bud basting beauty.

1. brown burger 

2. blend barbeque briskly 

3. blend big batch baked beans 

4. borrow big brown baking bowl 

5. begin blending batch before baking 

6. boldly bake barbeque burger bean batch 

7. bake boldly by barely burning barbeque burger bean batch 

8. boast bout baked burger bean batch before band buddies begin begging

Cranberry Salad Candles??

This one is especially fun and real? Yes, real and full of so much goodness. It comes to us from the pages of BonAppetit, which was an actual recipe put out in the 1960. So enjoy this wonderfully nutritious crowd wowing holiday beauty.

1 1-lb. can of Ocean Spray Whole Cranberry Sauce 
1 3-oz. pkg. red, yellow, or orange fruit-flavored gelatin 
1 cup boiling water 
1/4 teaspoon salt 
1 tablespoon lemon juice 
1/2 cup HELLMANN's Real Mayonnaise 
1 apple or orange, peeled or diced 
3/4 cup chopped walnuts 

Heat cranberry sauce, strain, set berries aside. Dissolve gelatin in hot juice and water. Add salt and lemon juice. 

Chill until thickened enough to mound slightly when dropped from a spoon. 

Beat in real mayonnaise with rotary beater till light and fluffy. Fold in 

cranberries, fruit and nuts. 

Divide mixture evently into eight 6-oz. fruit juice cans. Chill 4 hours or longer. Unmold. Garnish with real mayonnaise to taste. 

To flame: Cut thin birthday candle in half to shorten. Insert into tops of cranberry candles. Light. 

https://www.bonappetit.com/recipes/article/cranberry-mayonnaise-jello-salad-candles

Blasted Sweet corn. 

12- cans of corn 

20- packs of poprocks 

2- cups of brown sugar 

1-cup of  Tasmanian Rain water 

Mix the corn, brown sugar and water into a baking pan. Bake for 20 mins at 400 degrees. 

After baking let cool and sprinkle the poprocks on top  for and explosion of sugar and corn.

Topless Bacon, Lettuce, and no tomato Sandwich Plus

For those days before Christmas where your taste buds are drooling for a juicy (BLT) Bacon Lettuce and Tomato Sandwich all slimed up with Mayo ... but all you have is Alligator pears in the fridge ...Here is an amazing substitute using Alligator pears. (Makes two topless portions) 

Ingredients: 

4 - carefully fried up slices of Thick Smithfield Wood Smoked Bacon (The right hand burner on the glass Kenmore Elite set on single ring and just over 5 ... using a 14" TFAL "Skillet" - not to be confused with the band ...... T-Fal ---- turning often until crisp but not burned like a pagan sacrifice). 

2 - Toasted - Slices of Food For Life "The Original-Flourless /Sprouted Grain Bread/Cinnamon Raisin/ 7 Sprouted Grains" (All Natural - No Preservatives and good source of fiber) -- you eat it, you know it! Note: Toast it until it isn't frozen and not burnt. 

2 - generous Tablespoons of "Garden Fresh Gourmet" Fresh Salsa (repetition is the key to learning --- I guess it must be fresh;  unless it has an effervescing effect and smells like rotten fish eggs).  

1 - Mission - Ripe When Soft - Black, Alligator Pear - SKU number 4225 at Giant Food Store Wayne Avenue Chambersburg, PA. 

1 - Hearty Sweet Onion - 1/2" slice, separated into rings 

1 - Handful of Washed ...Nature's Promise Spring Mix and baby spinach - Note: Don't pick your nose while playing with the greens. The two greens don't mix well.  

3 - quick button presses on the battery operated grinder with Pink Himalayan Salt per topless sandwich 

3 - quick button presses on the battery operated grinder with whole black pepper corns per topless sandwich (this produces course ground black pepper. 

2 - heaping tablespoons of organic natural mayonnaise -- any brand will do ... it is all a lie, BUT there is a need for the sliming effect of the condiment. ( 2 per slice -- slime it up gooooood!) 

Now here is the order - plate up -- of the delectable pile creating this magnificent topless Christmas wonder: 

1. Toast 

2. MAYO 

3. Greens (split the handful - no boogers!) 

4. FRESH salsa 

5. 2 slices of bacon each sandwich - broken in half. 

6. 1/6 - 3 slices of the Black Alligator Pear. 

7. 3 artistically placed 1/2 sliced onion rings 

8. pepper 

10. salt 

11. EAT!! 

If the end result looks like the picture before you eat it .... 

Merry Christmas!!! 

Jeff